Everything all over again?

eSince the last day of 2011 I feel like I've hit puberty again, and hard.
I'm sitting in my mom's house behind the computer feeling bad(???) blogging. Same place I was when I was 16.

I don't understand how these things work. My life is a thousand times better now, I'm a spoilt brat for complaining. I have a job, I have my own place, I have the sweetest boyfriend ever, I have friends (real friends, not psycho ones), I've finished high school and learning a lot of new stuff and I finally know what I want to do with my life (become a hairdresser and be that 4evar and be great at it).
Practically I've got everything a girl could want (I also have a shit load of clothes).

Still I feel weird.

I feel like my friends hate me, I feel like everyone I talk to thinks I'm annoying as fuck.
I feel lonely every second Boris is not with me.
And for the first time in my life I really feel fat and ugly. Never felt that way. Always felt like I was pretty and my body also but that other people just didn't see it. Now it's the other way around.

The worst of all is that I feel like destroying everything I have. Not going to though.

I should'nt be nagging about this sort of stuff on the internet. It's stupid. Still doing it because I'm feeling like it and who else could I tell this shit at this very moment? Need to get it of my chest, sorta.
Otherwise it's going to come out when I'm drunk, start sobbing (drunk sobbing...) and make an ass out of myself.

Think I'll do that anyways.

Anyways, I thought I was done with this kind of bullshit. I guess hormones are still raging around in my body or something...Stupid piece of shit hormones..beh

Good night everyone/no one out there! And sorry to every one who has real problems (no parents, no house, no job, no friends, no one to love, suicidal tendencies, eating disorder, cancer, aids, manic depression, drug addiction etc...for being such a whiny bitch)