Outfits

Thursday February 16th

Vintage 60's dress-Zipper

Jacket-HnM for children

Shoes-HnM.

Friday February 17th

Striped blouse-HnM

Misfits shirt-Zipper

Shoes-Dr Martens (2nd hand)

Sunday February 19th

Lace top-Waterloo square market

Playsuit-Granmah!

Necklace-Zeeman

Bamboo earings-Zipper

Glasses-HnM

Shoes-Bufallo London

4:36

It's 4:36 in the morning.
Had a nice day at work and after that I watched soccer (of football or whatever you like to call it) with my colleges. I never knew I liked the sport that much.

After that I went out with my girlfriends and even a girlfriend who was not my girlfriend for a long time but actually had a lot of fun with her.
After a while we clearly had enough beer and went home.
Then I made pasta with Lot (super only add water and boil for 6 minutes pasta) and we talked a lot about stuff. We used to do that a lot. Staying up until 6 talking way too dramatic about stupid people and stupid things. Alcohol is the devil, or whatever.

Lot went to bed and I stayed up because I felt like listening to the Smiths looking like this:



I could stay up until Boris comes home from work, but that's just pointless.

I love nighttime.

X

Again Saturday night

I really used to love the weekend.
Now I don' t really care about it anymore.
Friday nights my sweet Boris usually tries to take me out, I won' t go, whine a LOT and it ends up in a fight. Drama crying fighting etc.
Then the Saturday nights usually are me on my own sitting behind the computer. I kind of enjoy it though. I don' t even have a computer and I get a but of extra night rest.
This evening I' m a bit disappointed though. I thought I was going to have a really long night wiv mah gurlz. One of them was tired and the other one got a text from her parents if she was coming home. In parent language that obviously means ' come home right now.

If it wasn't like minus 18 degrees outside I would go out.

I' m in love with my Cruella hair! I can be blonde or dark or both whenever I want. It' s great for up do' s.



I' m a bit anxious lately 'cause me and my friend Lot got robbed last monday evening. It was super scary and now I just realize things like that can happen like all the time. Maybe paranoid is a better word than anxious. It will pass though.
Still feeling a lot better than I did around new year' s.

Having a bit of trouble with Boris though.
I don' t know, we fight a lot and sometimes it get' s worse and sometimes it gets better. Still I don' t worry too much.. I'm not saying it doesn't bother me but I have this feeling that we love each other so much that it wil blow over and it doesn't matter anymore.
I think that if we break or something we will be automatically be drawn back together. Maybe it' s naive but that' s the way it feels.

Been listening Lana Del Rey' s album Born To Die the whole evening. Not all the songs are good but I like the whole sound of the album. Probably the closest to 'hip hop' I' ll ever come.

I think to much on nights like this. And then I start writing..

Also want to tell you about my 'countryside urge'.
I' m a real city girl but lately I have an urge to get out of the city. To have nothing to do (nothing to drink). Just peace and quiet. I am old...
At the same time I am dying to go back to Berlin.
I think I' m mostly longing to spend some quality time with Boris. Real time. Not between work and sleeping time.

And now I'm done. Wrote down things I had on my chest, and it feels nice.

Boris, if you ever read this.. I love you to death and you' re my everything and I really wish I could show you more of that.


x

Cruella hair

Holla!

This is my Cruella hair.



I' ve had it for over a week now and I' m pretty pretty pleased with it.

Everything all over again?

eSince the last day of 2011 I feel like I've hit puberty again, and hard.
I'm sitting in my mom's house behind the computer feeling bad(???) blogging. Same place I was when I was 16.

I don't understand how these things work. My life is a thousand times better now, I'm a spoilt brat for complaining. I have a job, I have my own place, I have the sweetest boyfriend ever, I have friends (real friends, not psycho ones), I've finished high school and learning a lot of new stuff and I finally know what I want to do with my life (become a hairdresser and be that 4evar and be great at it).
Practically I've got everything a girl could want (I also have a shit load of clothes).

Still I feel weird.

I feel like my friends hate me, I feel like everyone I talk to thinks I'm annoying as fuck.
I feel lonely every second Boris is not with me.
And for the first time in my life I really feel fat and ugly. Never felt that way. Always felt like I was pretty and my body also but that other people just didn't see it. Now it's the other way around.

The worst of all is that I feel like destroying everything I have. Not going to though.

I should'nt be nagging about this sort of stuff on the internet. It's stupid. Still doing it because I'm feeling like it and who else could I tell this shit at this very moment? Need to get it of my chest, sorta.
Otherwise it's going to come out when I'm drunk, start sobbing (drunk sobbing...) and make an ass out of myself.

Think I'll do that anyways.

Anyways, I thought I was done with this kind of bullshit. I guess hormones are still raging around in my body or something...Stupid piece of shit hormones..beh

Good night everyone/no one out there! And sorry to every one who has real problems (no parents, no house, no job, no friends, no one to love, suicidal tendencies, eating disorder, cancer, aids, manic depression, drug addiction etc...for being such a whiny bitch)

Hair pics #2

P.S: Developed a love for minty hair. Don't want it myself but would love to give it to someone with super pale (pinkish) skin and she'd had to wear red (or blue!!!) lipstick.

Things I would like to do in 2012

I never do this sort of things, but now I feel like doing it. Feels like 2012 is going to be a big year for me, with big things happening I mean:

- Loose weight (Probably on top of every girl's god damn list)
- Be a better girlfriend.
- Be a nicer person in general.
- Be clean.
- Spend (even) more time on my appearance (hair, clothes AND posture. Don't feel like being sloppy anymore).
- Bring my band back to life (write new songs).
- Become a (good) hairdresser (!!!!).
- Have pink with grey hair.
- Go back to my own haircolour.
- Go to Berlin with Boris again (!!!!!).

I could probably think of more, but I think this is already a good list and I think that if I'd actually do these things, it will make my life better. The problem with these lists are always that you do like...nothing from it, but I'll do my best.

P.S: Happy new year everyone! What would you like to do/happen in 2012?

XXX